I learned the hard way that not everyone you meet and befriend sticks around.

Some come, some go..
Then there’s the people that stand beside you through all the storms and last a lifetime.
Those are the keepers.
The thing is, though, I used to think that I wanted everyone to be a keeper…
But that’s just not how life works sometimes.
It’s hard when you’re missing someone or wondering why they don’t call anymore.. and you don’t always know why some fade away for no real reason.
But, over time, I slowly started to understand more about life and the why I had struggled with losing people for so long.
Everyone, everything, even the places you go has purpose- everything happens for a reason.
I just didn’t want to open my eyes to the reality because I thought it would hurt too much.
Yeah, it did hurt- losing people is never easy, but I started to understand that I lost some so that I could begin to find more of me..
Instead of focusing my time and energy on temporary people any more, I began to take closer look in the mirror..
And that kind of soul searching is the deepest and rawest kind of truth I had ever found..
I had been ignoring the stuff that I had buried..because it was easier that way.
The moment I began to truly see myself for who I was- that was when my healing started to happen.
The guilt, the remorse, even the regrets slowly started slipping away through my fingers as I elevated my heart, mind and soul.
That doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt, because there’s still times when the truth smacks me squarely in the heart and takes my breath away.
But that’s just part of the journey- my quest to uncover those parts of me that I had buried that lie dormant all this time.
So, I’m finally facing my demons, asking the hard questions and digging deep into my darkest places on my path to finally becoming whole.
While I don’t think I’ll ever stop evolving, growing and becoming better,
I’ve taken the most difficult step of all:
Starting and opening my eyes.
If I’m ever going to truly love myself and the people in my life, I have to heal, find myself and be free of the negative stuff and people for the first time in my life.
It won’t be easy, it won’t be fast, but I know that it will be totally worth it.
I’m worth it and so is my happiness.
So, as I think back to the ones I’ve lost along the way, I smile and thank them..
Because if they hadn’t left, I may never have had to do the hard stuff and begin to delve deeper..
And finding myself and my joy has been worth every tear, hurt and loss along the way.
And today, like all the days that follow, I utter the simplest of phrases that defines my new life and attitude:
“Today, I rise.”
|ravenwolf